Saturday, October 30, 2010

becoming schnitzel.

a narrative d.i.y.

you will need: 
two yards of schnitzel colored fabric, half a yard of yellow fabric, as much green felt as the nice man at the fabric store will give you for free, some needles & thread, 
and either emotional stability or somebody on call for when you need emotional stability. 
clues:
1. cut two pieces of brown fabric into very large matching schnitzel shapes {being careful to include orbs!!}
if you would like to add sexiness, do it now: rip off a shoulder, cut the bottom too short, or create some curve-hugging sections.
2. sew one half together.
3. become frustrated and cry {a la halloween of '06, '02, and '99} 
tweet about it. call mommy. it's ok.
4. sew the other half together.
5. stuff a few socks with paper towels, sew them into the orbs.
sew on the outside of the orbs to create the effect of an extra crispy edge
 at this point you may elect to be a lump of clay or poop. 
6. make a lemon!
cut out a circle, fold it in half, sew most of it, stuff it, sew the rest, draw lemony lines.
7. sew the lemon onto your brown shape wherever you want.
 like this! but also, at this point you can elect to be a long island iced tea.
8. make parsley! 
you may want to google image search "parsley" 
so that you don't end up as a lemon-mint bloody mary or 
a weed-dealing piece of poop with lemon on it. 
and... tada!!
you are a schnitzel.
accoutrements to consider:
-bread crumbs applied with spray glue {not the best idea if you intend to pass your costume down to your future children}
-an empty grey poupon jar as a vestibule for whiskey mustard-colored punch
-a friend dressed as potato salad
-a truck that serves schnitzel as your vehicle
happy hallowiener everybody!!

xoxo

yeh

28 comments:

salah said...

hhahahahahaaaha vintage morry. loves it

Anonymous said...

love your costume. you look adorable.

Alyssa said...

Molly you are my halloween hero!!! it turned out wonderfully :)

Big Gay Ice Cream Man said...

Horrible, wonderful, perfection.

Rio said...

Awesome! Very creative and unique! :) Happy Halloween!!!
(http://showersofsunflowers.blogspot.com)

Anonymous said...

oh wow...this is so amazing i might implode

Charlotte said...

you are amazing. 'nuff said.

daisychain said...

you are too fucking awesome girl.

Sara said...

Seriously excellent. Seriously. Your costume kicks the pants off every costume I've EVER worn in my 20 years of existence.

Anonymous said...

So beautiful..you AND the costume. You are so creative!

Meghan said...

This is the most amazing costume I have seen! You are adorable and literally, you are what you eat:)

Dancing Branflake said...

You are way too cute! I cannot believe you did this... although knowing you I realize you absolutely had to do this! Amazing!

christine, just bella said...

best Halloween costume ever. This made my day!

Meghan said...

this is ahhh mazing!

Kelsey said...

lol very obscure but creative and cute

this is me. said...

you are just adorable with this thing!

Kimbirdy said...

haha! you are adorable and awesome. i love your costume! and it's not just a schnitzel, it's a sexy schnitzel, in true halloween form. :)

hope you have a super fun halloween!

Megan said...

This is one of the best costumes I have seen!

{lovely little things} said...

That's so clever!
Just discovered you blog, I love it!

Ashley said...

haha love it!

it turned out really well! bravo!

Gali said...

The schintzel dedication is amazing!

bethani said...

very awesome and creative costume.. I was a bunch of grapres one year when i was probably about 10. All my grapes (balloons) managed to get popped before i made it home that night - lets just say i havent been food for halloween since.

bethani said...

very awesome and creative costume.. I was a bunch of grapres one year when i was probably about 10. All my grapes (balloons) managed to get popped before i made it home that night - lets just say i havent been food for halloween since.

Jude said...

Oh this is the most dash cunning costume! I would love to be my favorite dish next year and will just take the inspiration for now!

la petite coquine said...

How hysterical-I'm giggling inappropriately at the office!

Kara said...

This is just too awesome.

Mo Pie, Please said...

This is a great costume!

Celeste said...

This is seriously amazing.

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